Again
Remaking America in the mold of some previous time. Is that what the phrase, “Make America great again” means? Going back to some period in history when things were “great?”
Rich and I have been married for 60 years, and we think maybe we have lived in the best time of American history. Before we were born, World Wars I and II tore the world apart. Those couldn’t be the “great” years. In the late 50s we were teenagers in love, becoming hippies, experiencing more freedom than ever, and traveling the country in our orange VW van. We were carefree, invincible. We educated ourselves over time. Armed with advanced degrees, we found careers, had kids who were sensitive, caring, smart, and motivated. We were living the American dream.
But wait, let’s shine a careful light on the microcosm we lived in that, apparently, we will go back to “again.” Let’s start with high school in the late 1950s. Until the passage of Title IX in 1972, girls/women did not have the opportunity to play most competitive sports. In gym class, we played half-court basketball without any opportunity for school competition. We played badminton and softball, and we could compete in golf. We were cheerleaders to the boys/men who had excellent coaching, equipment, fields, and courts. A myth flourished that girls/women shouldn’t run because it might jeopardize their health. Trans youth were invisible, unacceptable, and not a part of any sports programs. People who were gay were in the closet. Is this the America we are making again?
In high school, girls were not allowed to take “shop” classes in which tools were used. Girls were relegated to “Home Ec.” where we learned to cook and sew. School counselors steered girls away from classes that would be “too hard” and “not useful” to them, classes like advanced levels of math, physics, and chemistry. Is this the America we are making again? Our parents and other relatives said we should go to college “to find a good man who would make money.” Is this the America we are making again?
In 1959, the Civil Rights Movement began. My church youth group traveled to Washington DC and, in front of the Whitehouse, carried signs demanding civil rights for all. We saw that hotels, buses, restrooms, and even public drinking fountains discriminated against people who were Black. We saw, on television news, the bloodshed over civil rights in the south. Is this the America we are making again?
Faculty of colleges we attended in the early 1960s advised girls/women to go into teaching or nursing, careers “most suited” for women. When I signed up to take Chemistry, Physics, and Calculus, professors told me on the first day that I was in the wrong class. I was the only woman in those classes. After I told my creative writing teacher that my dream was to write a biology textbook, she told me I should take enough classes in education so I could be a teacher. “Women don’t write science books,” she said, shaking her head. She was right. Authors of science textbooks were men. Is this the America we are making again?
As college freshman, girls were required to be in their dorm rooms at 7:00pm on weeknights and 10:00pm on weekends. The housemother checked us in and out of the dorm. For each minute we were late, we had to stay in our room an entire weekend. Freshman men had no curfews. When outside the dorm, the school required us to wear skirts, even in the freezing Massachusetts winter where a walk to class could take a half hour. Knee socks and tall boots did not prevent cold winds from blowing inside our skirts. Men had no dress code. Roe versus Wade did not pass until 1973. As a result, two girls in my dorm died after back-alley abortions. Another woman married the guy, divorced him after a year of beatings, and became a single working mother, unable to complete her education. Is this the America we are making again?
Rich and I decided to marry when he finished college. I was a junior, 20 years old. In Massachusetts at that time, age 21 was the age of consent for marriage. If both parents of the girl didn’t give permission, couples could not marry before the age of 21. I became an emancipated minor to marry! Rich had to be declared my guardian. He had to approve my housing, and the classes I took as a senior in college. I could not own property or have my own bank account. Rich’s name had to be on every legal document. My name could not be on the title of the car or on the lease for our apartment. Rich had to accompany me to doctor’s and dentist’s appointments. Is this the America we are making again?
I began teaching high school in western Massachusetts in1966. I was pregnant and thought I should give the school notice that I would be leaving in February, a week before my due date. The principal said he had to fire me on the spot because the district policy was to not allow pregnant teachers in classrooms. The school board had decided that high school students should not see pregnant women because they were “obscene.” Is this the America we are making again?
We set out for The Ohio State University in 1967 where we were graduate students with the title, Graduate Teaching Assistant, meaning that we taught various undergraduate classes. I was assigned a desk in a large office with the other graduate students who were all men. One day, there was a discussion about how much we were being paid, and I discovered that I was receiving half the pay of the men—all of us doing the same amount of work. When I spoke to the Dean of the Graduate School of Natural Sciences and asked him why my pay was half that of the men, he said that I had a husband who was making money. When I said that I didn’t think that was fair because I had the same workload as the men, he said that I should be glad that I was the token woman in the current crop of graduate students and that there were hundreds of women standing in line for my position and that if I didn’t like my pay, I could quit. He added that after I was awarded an MS, one token girl would replace me. Is this the America we are making again?
Also, while at Ohio State, I signed up for a class in wildlife management—again the only woman. On the first day of class, as I walked into the room, the professor called to me, “You are in the wrong class. I know, a lot of elementary ed. majors think this would be a cool class to take, but it is reserved for men who will work in the field of wildlife management.” I showed him my class card and said I was staying in the class. He said, “You will never get a job in this field because no women are ever hired.”
I replied, “When the laws excluding women change, I will be ready.” The laws did change in 1972 giving women equal opportunity, and I was hired by the US Fish and Wildlife Service as the first woman in a professional position. But my supervisors treated me so badly that I filed a discrimination complaint and won. My superiors still said, “The law might make us hire women, but it doesn’t make us keep them.” Is this the America we are making again?
The final blow from Ohio State came when I decided, after receiving an MS, that I wanted to pursue a PhD in Biology. On the reply to my application the words glared: “We have never graduated a woman PhD in biology, and we never intend to.” Is this the America we are making again?
After Rich graduated with a PhD in Mathematics, in 1971, we moved to a small town in Pennsylvania. I wrote pamphlets for the town on assorted topics. They told me that they had to credit the writing to a man because, “Townspeople would not believe what they were reading if a woman’s name was listed as the author.” When I was pregnant in this same small town, my ob/gyn would never speak with me, only with Rich! Is this the America we are making again?
In 1988, I was able to live my dream of writing a biology book! Our country had come a long way toward equality for women. The author team, along with Editorial, Marketing, and Sales departments, made the book a success for more than 35 years. However, as I traveled the country on a 13-year book promotion tour, I found discrimination to be rampant in school districts. In some states white students had the ultimate in biology labs, books, and equipment. Across town, where students were primarily Black, teachers had no lab supplies. They had one set of shared books, ripped and falling apart, and no heating system in the building. Is this the America we are making again?
I have not told my entire story of discrimination and lack of respect. What you have read here is just the tip of the iceberg. I had privilege. My plight was trivial compared to the inhumane cruelty heaped on all people of color, immigrants, and others who were marginalized. Is this the America we are making again?
We are moving towards an unknowable future. As I talk with friends and family about their feelings, I find fear, total desolation, depression, anxiety, anger, and a tiny bit of optimism for what can be done. So, I’m thinking of ways to resist the gloom, like joining others with either quiet or active resistance, sometimes hunkering down and taking strength from those who respect decency, compassion, kindness, and creativity. Each of us has a special creative way to offer support to others.
I am a writer, so I write pieces that might be helpful. I have promised my friends in the immigrant community that I am there for them come January when the inhumane and violent capture and incarceration in camps is promised in my home city. I have installed the Calm app on my phone. Rich and I talk about the best things that happened that day at the end of each day. This enables us to think about how much we are grateful for. We no longer watch news on TV—just enough to keep informed. We take walks and think about nature— snow piling up, the colors of evergreens, and birds finding seeds they stored earlier in the bark of trees. Nature heals us.
I recognize repeatedly that I have sisu, a Finnish word for which there is no direct English translation. It means determination, strength, tenacity, grit, bravery, and resilience in the face of long-term adversity. Sisu is a reserve of power that is the ability to overcome challenges that are extraordinary. Even though it is a part of my Finnish culture, I hope the idea of sisu can be useful to others. It is a mindset that might help tackle our new future.